Who cares?

Does anyone else outside the metro New York area care about "the Gates?" I saw on the news a woman from Louisiana (it might have been Arkansas) came to see them. She was oh so impressed. She couldn't wait to return home to tell everyone about them. Are you kidding me? All I see on the news, in the paper, on Beeferman.com is something about the gates. Is there nothing else to talk/write about. How about aliens? Nobody ever talks about aliens, but maybe, just maybe, these gates were the creation of some primitive alien race. Maybe these are alien larva (great name for a band) that will hatch in a month or two. We could be overrun by giant orange stick-like creatures who suck the creativity out of us and use it to go back to their boring planet and become so advanced that we move up the due date on their master plan to destroy the universe by millions of years. Maybe.

Some of them are aliens. 

Oh, my aching back!

My ass is killing me! I play basketball on Monday's in a men's over thirty league at the local high school. This week during my third game I took a fall like I've never had before. The story goes like this (so far as I can recall): I took a shot and missed, but with fervor and determination I leaped like I've never leaped before to grab the rebound. Unfortunately the ball careened off the backboard harder than I thought and I leaned back to get the ball. Since I was higher than I felt like I had ever been the thump I made when I hit the floor must've echoed through the hallways. I landed squarely on my ass bone cushioning my fall with my ass cheeks, elbows and head. I was in instant pain and after be helped up by the one person kind enough to extend a hand we finished off our opponent with the final two baskets. I limped and staggered my way to the end of the game. I came out after that, quickly dressed up and said my embarrassingly mellow "have a good night guys" to the sympathetic losers from the previous game. I'm still in pain mostly when I sit, stand or walk. I'm hoping to recover by the Superbowl or by the World Series at the latest. Oh, my aching back!